Tag Archives: LGBTQ

The Legacy of a Life

“Let your very existence be your song, your poem, your story.
Let your very identity be your book.
Let the way people say your name sound like the sweetest melody.”
 ― Charlotte Eriksson*

The end of the year draws close. For some of us it’s a time to take inventory, to review the past year and look ahead to the new one. For others it’s marked a passage, an ending, hopefully to be followed by a new beginning. From Wikipedia:

In ancient Roman religion and mythJanus is the god of beginnings and transitions, and thereby of gates, doors, doorways, passages and endings. He is usually depicted as having two faces, since he looks to the future and to the past. It is conventionally thought that the month of January is named for Janus.” Continue reading

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Conversations w/My Next Girlfriend: Episode 8

Note: This is eighth in a series of imaginary conversations with my next girlfriend.

Dear Next Girlfriend,

This past weekend I returned to my hometown of Racine, Wisconsin to celebrate the wedding of my niece Jennifer and her spouse Becky. They were married earlier this summer when same sex marriage was legalized in Wisconsin. They’ve been committed, loving partners for 12 years. I wish you could have joined me; it was a wonderful event and for me an affirmation that love is love, especially when families are able to accept, support and love their LGBTQ relatives and welcome their partners unconditionally. I am grateful to be a member of that kind of family. Continue reading

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A Triptych of Films about Family Love

“Family means no one gets left behind or forgotten.” — David Ogden Stiers

During the past week, I’ve seen three films, Love Is Strange, This Is Where I Leave You, and The Skeleton Twins.  What do a story about gay partners who marry after 40 years together and then lose their income and home, a family sitting Shiva after the death of their father and husband, and twins estranged for ten years who reunite after one of them attempts suicide, all have in common? What is the familiar theme? Quite simply, like David Ogden Stiers quote it’s family and, “…no one gets left behind or forgotten.” Continue reading

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Conversations w/My Next Girlfriend: Episode 7

Note: This is seventh in a series of imaginary conversations with my next girlfriend.

Dear Next Girlfriend,

You’ve been on my mind again. Over the Labor Day weekend and the following work week, I took my annual staycation. It’s time off of work during my favorite time of year. Those summer days right before fall and the beginning of the school year. I plan coffee dates or brunch with friends, wander in an art museum and linger in a library, check off things from my “to do only if I want to list,” see a movie matinee or two, write, nap, cook, and practice spontaneity. It is a time for reflection and restoration, and it’s a reminder I’m single. Continue reading

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Conversations w/My Next Girlfriend: Episode 6

Note: This is the sixth in the series of imaginary conversations with my next girlfriend.

Dear Next Girlfriend,

What a difference 10 days makes. A little over a week ago hundreds of same-sex couples in Wisconsin were getting married legally after a Federal District Judge, the Honorable Barbara Crabb, overturned the ban on same-sex marriage in Wisconsin. Many of the newlyweds (or newly registered) were people I knew, some who have been together 10, 15, 20 years or more, some raised children together, purchased homes, planned their lives as a family, and supported each other emotionally, physically, financially and spiritually. At least 637 marriage licenses have been applied for since Crabb’s ruling

Continue reading

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Home: Yesterday, Today & Tomorrow

“In life, a person will come and go from many homes. We may leave a house, a town, a room, but that does not mean those places leave us.” — Arik Berk

Yesterday
This Memorial Day weekend I returned to my childhood home. As a family, we celebrated the birthdays of two young men, grandnephews, the next generation coming up. The next day we planted flowers for my mother, their great grandmother, whose knees no longer bend, or are able to stand erect again without pain.

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Journal/Journey

“What matters in life is not what happens to you but what you remember and how you remember it.” ― Gabriel García Márquez

Years before I started writing for others, I wrote poetry and journaled for myself. Sometimes I would share a poem with the person who inspired it yet seldom a journal entry. Journaling by its very nature is a private act, a conversation with oneself, often a daily record of happenings, experiences and observations. Sometimes our loved ones or curious friends or colleagues surreptitiously read our journals. Much is written about the consequences of reading someone’s journal without the author’s permission.

Continue reading

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Conversations w/My Next Girlfriend: Episode 5

Note: This is the fifth in a series of imaginary conversations with my next girlfriend.

Dear Next Girlfriend,

It’s been awhile since I’ve talked with you. There’s something about winter that makes some of us isolate and retreat to our homes. I count myself in that group this year. It has been a particularly challenging season and like so many others this winter I found comfort and solace in my home, snuggled up on the couch like an ole’ hibernating bear. Now that the first real hints of spring have arrived, I’m awakened again and so are many of my desires. For many creatures, including us, spring is mating season. Continue reading

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The Ex Files

“Well, I’ve been afraid of changing
‘Cause I’ve built my life around you
But time makes you bolder
Children get older
I’m getting older too”    
Landslide, Stevie Nicks and Fleetwood Mac

Thomas Wolfe’s posthumously published novel, You Can’t Go Home Again, posits that we can never return to the home or town we left and find that it has remained as we remember, that the people and place are the same, though we have changed. The comfort we may seek in reliving memories is elusive. You can return home or revisit relationships however, and discover how much things have changed and remained the same.   Continue reading

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Conversations w/My Next Girlfriend: Episode 4

Note: The following post is fourth in a series of imaginary conversations with my next girlfriend.

Dear Next Girlfriend,

“Love yourself first and everything else falls into line.”  — Lucille Ball.

Who would have thought that Lucille Ball, comedienne and star of I Love Lucy, could express in a few simple words what I finally learned to practice after a decade in therapy?  Yes, it’s that time of year again, love is in the air and chocolatiers, florists, restaurants and the folks at Hallmark are busy trying to get into our pockets, and not to be too crude, but for those of you out there in a relationship, your “special someone” is  trying to get into your pants. Next girlfriend, I was hoping to be included in that group. Oh well, I’m going to practice patience while I wait for you and continue to enjoy and celebrate my single life, and today, acknowledge all the love I’m grateful to both give and receive. Continue reading

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