Father | Mixed Metaphors

Dec 12 2021

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The Legacy of Material Things

“We didn’t have much, but we had love.” ― Tyler Perry

“I’ve not always possessed what I’ve wanted, but I always received what I needed, and most days it was simply the love of friends and family, and the ability to live comfortably in my own skin.” ― From Mixed Metaphors, Oh My! Dispatch from the Hideout: Letter to Loved Ones

It’s that time of year when we celebrate the holidays, often the traditions of the generations that preceded us, the food we eat, the rituals we recreate, the stories we tell, and the memories we share. This is our legacy. It’s also that time of year when many of us look back and reflect on the year behind us and grieve our loved ones no longer present in life.

We inherit many things from our family, from our DNA to our shared lived experiences, both nature and nurture. We also inherit material things, bequeaths, mementos, and gifts from family, friends, and loved ones. They also represent a legacy. What creates a person’s legacy? Continue reading →

Tagged Brother, Chosen Family, COVID-19, Death, Family, Father, Friends, Gratitude, Grief, Holidays, Legacy of Material Things, Loss, Love, Marriage, Relationships, Sisters

Aug 28 2021

Posts

Dispatch from the Hideout: Pod Squad 2.0

“Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced.” — James Baldwin

Last weekend, on Friday, I spent time with friends, celebrating a birthday on a pontoon boat on Lake Mendota in Madison, WI on a hot, beautiful, late summer day. The next morning, I had brunch outdoors with three Pod Squad members (some of my quarantine bubble of friends and family), and continued the birthday celebration of one of our members. On Sunday, I setup and staffed the OutReach Magic Pride Festival outdoors at Olin Turville Park. We watched the entertainment program and speakers on a Jumbotron screen while people picnicked.

When the weekend was over, I realized I spent more time with people than I have in over 18 months, many who I didn’t know if they were vaccinated or not, including Pod Squad members, friends, and members of my LGBTQ+ community, unmasked outdoors. There was no guarantee during the latter event that everyone was vaccinated. Continue reading →

Tagged COVID-19, COVID-19 Booster, COVID-19 Journal Project, Dispatch from the Hideout, Facemasks, Family, Father, Flu Shot, Friends, Madison, Pandemic, Pandemic of the unvaccinated, Pod Squad 2.0, Politics, Quarantine Bubble, Socially Distance, Unvaccinated, Vaccinated

Jul 31 2021

Posts

Dispatch from the Hideout: Two Steps Back

“It is necessary sometimes to take one step backward to take two steps forward.” — Vladimir Lenin

“Captain, May I take two steps forward?” — Childhood backyard game

Yesterday, I traveled to Racine, Wisconsin to visit my 91-year-old father who gratefully remains independent, vaccinated, and healthy as he continues to live alone. Since I live 100 miles away, I can’t just drop-in for a quick visit and check-in on him. Prior to the pandemic, we scheduled a weekly phone date every Sunday, and I’d visit him in-person at least once a month The COVID-19 pandemic changed all that. Continue reading →

Tagged COVID-19, COVID-19 Journal Project, Death, Delta Variant, Dispatch from the Hideout, Family, Father, Friends, Home, Masks, Pandemic, The Loud Family, The New Normal, Two Steps Back, Vaccination

Jan 18 2021

1 Comment

Posts

Mouse Turd Cake & Other Birthday Memories

“Auntie Linda, it’s okay that you’re old. It means you’re not dead!” — Four-year-old niece, Gemma

The Backstory: When Gemma was four years old, I was bending over her car seat buckling her in, she saw my face up close, let’s be precise, the wrinkles of my face up close. In that observational, yet nonjudgmental matter-of-fact manner that children possess, she commented, “Auntie Linda, you’re old!!!” My old, wrinkled face couldn’t hide my hurt feelings. My niece Gemma loves me wholeheartedly and clearly didn’t want me to feel bad, so she replied in a cheery voice with a smile on her face, “Auntie Linda, it’s okay that you’re old, it means you’re not dead!” And you know, she’s right, I’m not dead, and I’m grateful for that. Gemma is now 16-years-old and I remain older and above ground. Continue reading →

Tagged Birthday Cakes, Birthday Parties, Birthdays, Childhood Memories, COVID-19, Death, Exes, Family, Father, Friends, Gratitude, Holidays, January, Loss, Love, Memories, Mother, Reminiscences, Sister, Stories

Nov 25 2020

4 Comments

Posts

Thanksgiving: Things Change (Again!)

“The only constant is change.” — Heraclitus

“Things do not change; we change.” — Henry David Thoreau

As I write, it’s the Sunday before Thanksgiving. I’ve been rereading Thanksgiving Holiday journal entries from the past 12 years, plus my Thanksgiving blog reminiscences. A theme emerged which I’ve addressed before, yet continues to weave through my life — and the lives of loved ones — things change.

Thanksgiving is traditionally a family holiday, whether you celebrate it with your bio or chosen family. I’ve done both. Another theme became apparent as I reread what I’ve written in the past, grief and gratitude go hand-in-hand. Continue reading →

Tagged COVID-19, Family, Father, Friends, Future, Gratitude, Grief, Holidays, Home, Memoir, Mother, Past, Pie, Present, Racine, Reminiscence, Sisters, Stories, Thanksgiving, Things Change, Turkey, Zoom

Sep 07 2020

1 Comment

Posts

Dispatch from the Hideout: Staycation Edition

Staycation – “A vacation that is spent at one’s home enjoying all that home and one’s home environs have to offer.”— Urban Dictionary

Things change, and some things remain the same.

From an earlier Mixed Metaphors, Oh My! essay about Staycations from September 6, 2015, The Pleasures (and Lessons) of a Staycation:

It’s that time of year again when September arrives and I extend the Labor Day holiday by taking my annual Staycation. While students return to school after their families unpack from vacation and pack those back-to-school backpacks full of brand-new school supplies, I take a break from my day-to-day work routines and make my “to-do only if I want to lists.” For me the essence of a staycation is to practice spontaneity (yes, I admit that I need to practice), sleep in if I want to, brunch at home or out with friends, attend movie matinees on weekdays, plan lots of coffee dates, stay in pajamas if I want to and take a vacation from showering for a day, and most importantly write, and edit, and write some more. I read too, essays and blogs, opinion pieces online, poetry and movie reviews and reread my journals. Continue reading →

Tagged Best Friends, Brother, Changing Seasons, Coronavirus, COVID-19, Death & Dying, Dispatch from the Hideout, Family, Father, Films, Friends, Grandniece, Labor Day, Memoir, New Baby, Pandemic, September, Social Distancing, Staycation, Things Change, Wedding

Nov 21 2018

Posts

Hibernation & the Holidays: Retreat to the Hideout

Hibernation definition — an extended period of remaining inactive or indoors

Hideout synonyms — hiding place, hideaway, retreat, refuge, shelter, safe house, sanctuary, sanctum

First, I’m a creature of habit. I find comfort in my routines. There’s a rhythm to my days and nights. I read somewhere recently that we all experience some degree of OCD behavior. It’s certainly true for me. The gears of my Circadian clock are still trying to mesh with some synchronicity since the ending of Daylight Savings Time (DST) and turning the clocks one hour behind. Who knew that would make such an impact? They’re grinding a little right now as I try to slip back into a sleep cycle. Continue reading →

Tagged Chosen Family, Death, Family, Father, Friends, Hideout, Holidays, Home, Loss, Memories, Mother, Racine, Recovery, Relationships, Retreat, Seasons, Sisters, Stories, Thanksgiving, The Changing Seasons, The Loud Family, Winter

Oct 21 2018

1 Comment

Posts

Holding On & Letting Go

“Life is a balance of holding on and letting go.” — Rumi

Holding on and letting go is one of the subjects I keep coming back to, a thread in many of my essays and remembrances. It’s an essential element in the cycle of life, a theme in many of my memories, a lesson to be learned and practiced as needed, and today again, present in my journey.

This is not unique to me. It’s a universal truth; it’s what makes us human, mortal, and sentient beings. Holding on and letting go is one of the first things we learn as an infant, one of the first things we teach as a parent, one of the most difficult emotions we experience at the beginning and at the end of our lives, and the lives of loved ones, as we examine who and what we need to let go of and who and what we need to hold onto. Continue reading →

Tagged AA, Death, Family, Father, Friends, Future, Grief, Holding On, Home, Impermanence, Letting Go, Loss, Love, Memories, Mother, Past, Present, Sisters

Oct 05 2018

1 Comment

Posts

You Can’t Go Home Again

Hat Tip to Thomas Wolfe

“You can’t go back home to your family, back home to your childhood…back home to places in the country, back home to the old forms and systems of things which once seemed everlasting but which are changing all the time…” — Thomas Wolfe

First, let me go on record that as a memoir writer and someone who writes about family, relationships, and the mundane moments of everyday life — you can return home by remembering. I’ve learned though as a reminiscence writer that memory is malleable and can play tricks on you, sometimes sanding off the rough edges of some memories, while sharpening others. The nation has witnessed this phenomenon the past couple of weeks during the Supreme Court Justice nomination hearings. Continue reading →

Tagged 1968, Body, Brother, Death, Family, Father, Grief, High School Reunion, Home, Loss, Mind, Mother, Racine, Sisters, Spirit, Tag Team Sisters

Jul 28 2018

2 Comments

Posts

Tag Team Sisters

“When someone has cancer, the whole family and everyone who loves them does, too.” — Terri Clark

“The simple message of It Takes a Village is as relevant as ever: We are all in this together.”
― Hillary Rodham Clinton

When I walk into a room and friends who I love and trust ask me, “How are you?” or “What’s new?” I break down in tears. I’m a mess. I’m normally the in-charge eldest child, natural leader, the first one to raise my hand with questions, a confident, outspoken, and opinionated woman — the kind of person who seems like she has it all together, even when she doesn’t. I can’t pretend anymore. Continue reading →

Tagged Brother, Cancer, Chosen Family, Death, Family, Father, Friends, Grief, Home, It Takes a Village, Loss, Love, Mother, Racine, Sisters, Tag Team Sisters, The Loud Family

Mixed Metaphors

Mixed Metaphors, Oh My! – A place where words, this writer, and readers play together.

Tag Archives: Father

The Legacy of Material Things

Dispatch from the Hideout: Pod Squad 2.0

Dispatch from the Hideout: Two Steps Back

Mouse Turd Cake & Other Birthday Memories

Thanksgiving: Things Change (Again!)

Hibernation & the Holidays: Retreat to the Hideout

Holding On & Letting Go

You Can’t Go Home Again

Tag Team Sisters