Tag Archives: Death

Dispatch from the Hideout: Casualties

“Life seems sometimes like nothing more than a series of losses, from beginning to end. That’s the given. How you respond to those losses, what you make of what’s left, that’s the part you have to make up as you go.” ― Katharine Weber

“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.” ― Laozi

This past Saturday night we planned an event, Last Night at the Hotel Bar, a reunion of sorts, a wake, and sendoff, not for a person but for a place, The Brink Lounge in Madison, Wisconsin. It was a gathering for Madison Indie Filmmakers, friends, and supporters. We referred to ourselves as the Barflies. The Brink Lounge was closing permanently on April 30. Continue reading

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Poop Eggs, Orphan Holidays, Home Alone, & Gratitude

“For me, this holiday is a time for reflection, for renewing a spiritual connection, and for experiencing the hope and promise of the new beginnings of the spring season.” — An excerpt from my journal, Perfectly Flawed.

Leading up to Easter this year, I spent a lot of time reminiscing, rereading journal entries from holidays past and Easter-themed blog musings. Holidays, and the family rituals which we grew up with and the memories that remain, are mile markers of our journey in life. They provide a backdrop of the values and traditions of our ancestry and worship, the foundation of our beliefs. From childhood to adulthood, to this third chapter in my life, holiday traditions and rituals have evolved, some things nostalgically remain the same, others changed as I changed, and as the world changed. Continue reading

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Celebrating a Decade of Mixed Metaphors, Oh My!

“Sometimes we become what we do. I became a writer by writing.— Linda Lenzke, Blogger & More

“I write to discover what I know.” — Flannery O’Connor

Ten years ago in January, I took a WordPress class at Madison College. I decided that I wanted to take the next step as a writer: design, create, and launch a blog. I had been taking a series of reminiscence writing classes from a mentor and writing coach who would later become a friend and writing partner, Sarah White of First Person Productions. Prior to the classes, I had been writing for decades, poetry, spoken word monologues, stand-up comedy, and journaling for over 30 years. The reminiscence classes were a launchpad for my memoir, Perfectly Flawed, which I’m still writing, editing, and adding content as I live and write. Continue reading

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Letter to Loved Ones (Just in Case)

“My life has not always been easy, but it’s always been worth the effort. I’ve not always possessed what I’ve wanted, but I always received what I needed, and most days it was simply the love of friends and family, and the ability to live comfortably in my own skin.” — from Dispatch from the Hideout: Letter to Loved Ones

For those who know me personally and/or read my blog or social media posts, I’m open and share freely about my personal life, some say I overshare. I write about my lived experience, often the mundane moments of everyday life, and sometimes I wax philosophically or poetically about our shared universal human experience. In essence, I’m an open book, and you choose whether to pick it up and read, or not! Continue reading

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Childhood Report Cards: Snapshots of the Future

“There is always one moment in childhood when the door opens and lets the future in.” — Graham Greene

On April 1st my sister Tami, niece Gemma and I traveled to Racine to visit our father and Gemma’s grandfather to celebrate his April Fool’s Birthday. We told stories, reminisced about our shared past — updated each other on our current lives — and our plans for the future.

We shared stories about all the pranks our family played on Dad for his April Fool’s Birthday over the years. We updated each other on what’s happened since we saw or talked to each other last. Gemma talked about graduating from high school and her plans to attend the University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee in the fall.

Dad has been downsizing and purging items from our childhood home with the help of my siblings. He’s 92-years-old, uses a walker, and navigates the first floor of his home, and no longer uses the stairs to the basement and second story. Family members have been claiming items one last time from the basement and attic that we each want to keep, before the dumpster was scheduled to arrive later in April and our brother Rick and his crew of two helpers, would dispose of things that weren’t claimed or recycled. Continue reading

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Dispatch from the Hideout: Omicron Edition

“The year 2021 has been like a roller coaster. It was supposed to be the year the pandemic fizzled out. Instead, it was a year of intense whiplash.” — Julie Ries

“It’s not over, till it’s over!” — Yogi Bera

This dispatch is part holiday season review, 2021 year-end wrap up, plus a look ahead, and once again, an acceptance of opposing conditions, that things both change and remain the same. It has been a year characterized by both hope and despair, gratitude and grief, and resistance and surrender.

The past year — or 22 months — depending on how you want to count — we’ve been riding the coronacoaster of the COVID pandemic. There have been highs and lows on this ride, whiplash, and screams. We want to get off this ride, yet we can’t until it’s over. Continue reading

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The Legacy of Material Things

“We didn’t have much, but we had love.” ― Tyler Perry 

 “I’ve not always possessed what I’ve wanted, but I always received what I needed, and most days it was simply the love of friends and family, and the ability to live comfortably in my own skin.”  ―  From Mixed Metaphors, Oh My! Dispatch from the Hideout: Letter to Loved Ones

It’s that time of year when we celebrate the holidays, often the traditions of the generations that preceded us, the food we eat, the rituals we recreate, the stories we tell, and the memories we share. This is our legacy. It’s also that time of year when many of us look back and reflect on the year behind us and grieve our loved ones no longer present in life.

We inherit many things from our family, from our DNA to our shared lived experiences, both nature and nurture. We also inherit material things, bequeaths, mementos, and gifts from family, friends, and loved ones. They also represent a legacy. What creates a person’s legacy? Continue reading

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Thanksgiving: Things Change (Again, Again!)

“The only constant is change.” — Heraclitus

Things do not change; we change.” — Henry David Thoreau

From November 25, 2020…

As I write, it’s the Sunday before Thanksgiving. I’ve been rereading Thanksgiving Holiday journal entries from the past 12 years, plus my Thanksgiving blog reminiscences. A theme emerged which I’ve addressed before, yet continues to weave through my life — and the lives of loved ones — things change.

I begin this reminiscence and musing about the Thanksgiving holiday with the same quotes and sentiment from a year ago when COVID-19 was surging and many families and friends had to make the difficult decision of whether or not they would celebrate in-person, and how it might be different from the traditional holidays from the past. The only change in this introduction is I’ve been rereading 13 years of journal entries, and two years of Mixed Metaphors, Oh My! Thanksgiving: Things Change essays. Continue reading

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9/11: When Time Stops & Memories Live On

September 11 attacks began at 7:46 AM (CST) on Tuesday, September 11, 2001

On That Day

It was an absolutely perfect, late summer, early fall day. The sky was blue — almost translucent — clear and cloudless. The temperature was mild, in the 60’s that morning. I was getting dressed for work. Before I left for the office, I called one of my best friends and chosen family, Donna Salverson. Continue reading

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Dispatch from the Hideout: Two Steps Back

“It is necessary sometimes to take one step backward to take two steps forward.” — Vladimir Lenin

“Captain, May I take two steps forward?” — Childhood backyard game

Yesterday, I traveled to Racine, Wisconsin to visit my 91-year-old father who gratefully remains independent, vaccinated, and healthy as he continues to live alone. Since I live 100 miles away, I can’t just drop-in for a quick visit and check-in on him. Prior to the pandemic, we scheduled a weekly phone date every Sunday, and I’d visit him in-person at least once a month The COVID-19 pandemic changed all that. Continue reading

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