Aug 10 2013
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Posts

Conversations with My Next Girlfriend

Preface

Since the breakup of my fifteen-year relationship, five-and-a-half years ago, I remain living in the past to some degree. I’m aware that as long as my past inhabits my present, I’m essentially still in a relationship, even if it’s predominately virtual and one-sided.  I have conversations in my head — the closure and amends we never had a chance to process together; I work out the “hers, mine and ours” unfinished business of the breakup in scenarios in my dreams, I continue to share stories with friends that begin, “When I was with my ex…” and I make promises to myself to never repeat the same mistakes, or expect people to be anything but who they are, not what I wished they’d be, and yes, I include myself in that awareness. This is the legacy of being the person who was left. It takes time. The good news is we are working on redefining our relationship as friends and chosen family. Continue reading →

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Aug 03 2013
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Posts

Third Act

“There’s a moment when people know — whatever their skills are at denial — that they have passed from what they can delude themselves into thinking is middle age to something that you could call the third act.”  Nora Ephron

First, let me say denial is powerful. It can both serve us and hurt us, but in the end it must be faced and addressed. Though I am living the sixth decade of my life, a thirty-something still resides inside, a youthful, progressive-thinking woman trying to figure what she wants to be when she grows up. I am always surprised when I look in the mirror and see my sixty-something self. Continue reading →

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Jul 26 2013
Posts

Summer So Green

The past few days have been a reminder of how grateful I am for the bountiful beauty and power of nature. Living in Wisconsin, our lives ebb and flow with the changing seasons, sometimes winter is unrelenting and it’s a struggle just to get out the door for our day-to-day lives. We are restored in the spring when the changing weather brings us hope and quells the itchiness of spring fever. Summer is our reward, a time for leisure and vacations. In the autumn we reap the harvest of the land and prepare for the long, cold nights again, the cycles of change repeated. Continue reading →

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Jul 17 2013
Posts

Last Stop, Fruitvale Station

Like countless others this week all over America, I’ve been struggling with how to respond to the acquittal of George Zimmerman for the senseless, certainly preventable, and heartbreaking murder of Trayvon Martin, an innocent young man, who because of his death was unable to defend himself in front of the jury who found the man who was armed with a gun and pulled the trigger that killed him, innocent of any murder charges. George Zimmerman got his day in court, yet in the opinion of this writer, Trayvon Martin had his civil rights, his reputation, and his life stolen from him simply because of his race. Continue reading →

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Jul 04 2013
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Posts

The Lone Ranger, Annie Oakley and the Bride Doll

Today, I saw the premiere of “The Lone Ranger.” Critics have been ravaging the film for many reasons, but for this writer it was a nostalgic journey back to a time of childhood heroes and themes of good versus evil, white hats and black hats. Continue reading →

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Jun 23 2013
Posts

The Skinny on Medicalized Obesity

On Tuesday, June 18, 2013, I learned I have another disease —obesity. The American Medical Association (A.M.A.) at their annual meeting in Chicago recognized obesity as a disease in hopes that the medical community could treat this issue that affects one in three adult Americans, nearly 75 million, and about 12 million (16.9%) U.S. children ages 2 to 19 with education, prevention and intervention. Advocates hope this declaration will help improve reimbursement for obesity drugs, counseling, and surgery. Continue reading →

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Jun 15 2013
Posts

Three Fathers

Father’s Day is Sunday and I’ve been reflecting on my family history and the role of the men in my life. I hail from a matriarchal background, from both my paternal and maternal lineages. The families were headed by women, by default due to death and abandonment on my father’s side, and because of death on my mother’s. The women, my great grandmothers and grandmothers were loyal, hardworking and committed to their namesakes and either outlived or outlasted their male counterparts. Today, my mother carries on the tradition and is the head of my immediate family, she is the glue that holds us together and usually has the last word. Continue reading →

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Jun 03 2013
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Posts

A Moving Story III

Home Again

Home again; another journey ends. I’m home again and grateful. Yesterday, when I woke up in my new home after making coffee, followed by making my bed (old habits are hard to break), I sat at my desk, looked out my window on the world — or at least my neighborhood — and journaled. I immediately felt comforted by a familiar ritual as I reflected on the days that led to my arrival here.  Continue reading →

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May 25 2013
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Posts

A Moving Story II

Everything is Up in the Air

It’s been two weeks since I’ve posted on my blog. It’s making me anxious, one more ticking clock, the others I’m unable to locate since my home is in chaos as I prepare for my move next weekend. My life is like the children’s game, or more precisely the prank, 52 Card Pickup. Everything is up in the air, in disarray, including the organization of my mind, a virtual house of cards, as I teeter on the brink of collapsing emotionally and physically. I’m reminded how much I depend upon my daily compulsive behaviors to keep me anchored and how they prevent me from metaphorically floating or wandering away. Continue reading →

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May 11 2013
Posts

A Grateful Daughter

Every year when Mother’s Day approaches, I think about all the things I want to tell my mother, all the many ways I’m grateful to be her daughter. Most years I find one or two things to share with her, as I sit with her and hold her hand, I share a story about what it means to me to be her daughter.  Continue reading →

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