Mixed Metaphors

“A person who has an avid, passionate interest in food and treats eating or cooking as a fun hobby rather than just a basic way to stop hunger.” — Wikipedia

It’s complicated. Food nurtures us, providing the fuel and nutrition we need. The words nurture and nutrition have the same origin. Food is often associated with pleasant experiences and traditions including holidays, and time shared with friends and family. We go out to restaurants, invite friends in for dinner, and sometimes enjoy a pizza or ice cream late at night alone in the privacy of our home. We eat for the fuel it provides, and we eat for pleasure.

It’s also described as comfort food. For me, that’s also a problem. One of the topics I currently work on in therapy is my history of compulsive-eating and using food to numb-out or stuff my feelings. Before I used alcohol and nicotine to do that, I used food. In my recovery from substances and harming behavior, I needed to finally face my Waterloo, or more accurately, the kitchen table and the plate in front of me.

From AI and Wikipedia:

Core Traits of a Foodie

• Love for trying new things: Always eager to taste different flavors and global dishes.
• Active search: Seeking out new food trucks, hidden local spots, or popular restaurants.
• Beyond basic cost: Enjoying simple street food just as much as fancy meals.
• Food as a hobby: Talking about, photographing, cooking, or planning travel around food.

Foodie vs. Gourmet

• Foodie: An everyday person who loves food culture, curiosity, and new experiences.
• Gourmet: Someone with formal, expert training or a very high-end focus on expensive, luxury ingredients.

The Backstory

Our mother was a working mother, and like her, I learned to cook when I was a young pre-teen. As the eldest, I was my mother’s sous chef, starting dinner prep before she got home and helping her get it on the table and feed our growing family. My first job after baby-sitting at the age of 16, I began working in my aunt and uncle’s diner, Bill’s Lunch. There were no booths or tables, only a serpentine counter with metal stools with red round leather cushions you could spin. I worked on weekends, and after the morning rush, I was the sole prep and flat-top grill cook, waitress, bussed all the dishes, ran the dishwasher, took out the trash and mopped floors before closing up.

I loved cooking on the flat top: burgers, hash, pancakes, eggs and omelets to order. I served hot beef and roast turkey specials on white bread with mashed potatoes and gravy, homemade chili with Saltine crackers, and the soup of the day. I could fry the perfect chicken and golden crip crinkle-cut fries. One morning when I lit the pilot light on the French fryer, I singed my eyebrows and peach fuzz facial hair.  When the restaurant was empty, I’d make Cole slaw in the back prep kitchen, slice onions, and tomatoes. After work I smelled like the pickles and onions from making burgers and deep-fried food.   

Growing up as a baby boomer in a blue collar, working-class family, I was described as a ‘good eater.’ For the exception of a couple food groups (canned vegetables for example), I cleaned my plate and often had seconds if they were available. Sometimes that simply was a slice of white bread and gravy. Yes, I’m old. I’m an emotional eater. I used food to comfort myself.

My sister Roz and I babysat for our parents when we were preteens and they would go out to the bars or a restaurant on a Saturday night. One of us would make a run to the A&P on our bikes and buy chocolate candy or ice cream pies. The other option, which was risky, we’d eat the cookies and candy treats from the cupboard reserved for the family for the week, however in a family of four kids, later six, supplies were closely monitored and consequences could be severe.

As an adult, I continued to cook as a young married woman, adding recipes that appealed to my husband, Frank, and his Hungarian and German heritage. He also enjoyed seafood and spicy foods, not part of my cooking repertoire. We both worked in physically-demanding jobs when we were first married and lost a lot of weight. We walked everywhere. I baked our bread for the week and we made wine in our walk-in pantry.

Reprinted from: Till Death Do Us Part: Part II — The Middle Years

“We created weekly rituals of our own, breakfasts and dinners at our favorite diner, The Javelin, named after one of American Motors car models. Sometimes we’d eat sirloin burgers at one of Frank’s favorite bars, or for special dinners, House of Gerhard, an upscale German restaurant where Frank would order Bouillabaisse, my go-to, Rouladen. Some Fridays we’d walk to the Italian Workingmen’s Club for their Friday Fish Fry or Italian specials.  Food was one of our shared passions. Frank was probably the first true foodie that I met.”

Reprinted from: Till Death Do Us Part: Part II — The Middle Years

“Frank and I often went out on double dates with my parents on Saturday nights. We had a lot of fun together and share many memories which have now become legendary stories, like the night the four of us went to dinner at the then popular Racine Supper Club, Wigs & Ellie’s. Frank was a big eater and though my father was a small man, he also had a good appetite.”

“When the waiter described the specials for the evening, sweetheart steak fillets for two, and barbeque ribs, six or twelve-bone racks, Frank ordered the sweetheart special. My father, surprised and delighted, asked, “You can do that?” The waiter nodded yes, and he proceeded to order the sweetheart special too. Now it was my turn to order. I looked at my mother. We both love ribs and I said, I think I can eat a rack of 12, her eyes brightened and she said, “I will too!”

“The waiter left, put in our orders, and returned with a galvanized steel bucket filled with an iceberg lettuce salad. He carried tongs, a Lazy Susan of salad dressing and monkey pod bowls. Next were small loaves of freshly baked bread (we asked for seconds). Our entrees came out and our table looked like mealtime with the cartoon characters, the Flintstones.  The chef came out to meet the guests at the table of four eating enough food for eight people. This was one of many shared occasions with good food and beer, lots of both.”

When we moved to Madison, we hosted UW Badger Football weekends with my family which featured beer, chili with all the fixings, Kringle from our hometown, Racine, and the next day Ham & Cheese Quiche, coffee, juice, and you guessed it, more Kringle.

One year, after years of eating two Thanksgiving dinners with each of our families, Frank and I invited both families to our home in Madison. We made a 7-course feast, featuring three entrees: Roast Duck, L’ Orange, Roast Turkey and all the sides, and Glazed Ham. Frank’s Aunt Char contributed a case of Champagne, and after the meal and cleanup, and we said goodbye to some family members, the remaining family saw a movie together, The Way We Were, and returned home to finish the Champagne.

The Cookie Thief, Aka, Lolly Keebler

When Mom baked cookies, she’d freeze some for the future. Yes, you guessed it. I’d snatch a few frozen chocolate chip cookies. One time when our parents were trying to identify the cookie thief from the freezer, I bribed my younger sister Cindy to take the wrap in exchange for my allowance. As Karma would have it, she reminded of that crime throughout our adult life and I made amends to her one last time on her death bed, really!

I still keep some home-baked cookies in the freezer intending to defrost them for a future date, yet I’ve sometimes eaten them frozen with milk on ice. I’m still that girl. My love of cookies and milk earned me a nickname.

Excerpt from an essay, Procrastination Station: Dysfunction Junction:

“A nickname assigned to me early in my marriage by my husband Frank and his brother Dennis in the early 1970’s was inspired by two things, the first a song from Schoolhouse Rock, a series which aired on ABC from 1973 to 1975 described as, “animated shorts adapting the multiplication tables to songs written by Bob Dorough; Dorough also performed most of the songs.”  Multiplication Rock was soon followed by Grammar Rock. My nickname was Lolly Keebler inspired by the song, Lolly, Lolly, Lolly, Get Your Adverbs Here and my love of cookies and milk.”

For the Love of Movies, Buttered Popcorn, & Theater Candy

Reprinted from For the Love of Movies (& Memories of My Mother):

“During the late 1950s and early sixties, Saturday night was movie night with Mom and my sister Roz, and later siblings, Cindy and Rick joined us in front of the television. Dad would sometimes go out to the neighborhood bar and be gone most of the afternoon and evening. This was Mom’s opportunity for a movie night to watch one of her favorite genres with her kids (besides Paul Newman movies and romantic melodramas).”

“She was too scared to watch them alone. She’d let us stay up late with her. With Pyrex bowls filled with real buttered popcorn in our laps, and the lights turned off, we’d watch Creature Features, scary science fiction movies of the time, like It Came from Outer Space, The Creature from the Black Lagoon, and the original, The Day the Earth Stood Still. If we’d begin to fall asleep, she’d wake us up until the movie was over and then she’d send us upstairs to our bedroom; frightened and tired girls, scared of our own shadows and creaking footsteps on the stairs.”

A theater was walking distance from our childhood home (to be precise, at minimum a couple of miles) and on weekends showed matinees of Disney films like Flubber or The Shaggy Dog, with cartoons of course before the feature.

Roz and I would save our allowance for our tickets, real buttered-popcorn and theater candy. Concessions were far simpler then, with limited choices compared to today, often a fresh-popped popcorn concession stand with soda and a vending machine with boxed candies and candy bars.

As an adult, I considered myself more of a cinephile. Before Frank and I married, with his friend and bridge partner, Hal Stern, a French professor and film society curator at the University of Wisconsin – Parkside, I learned a lot about film history. Hal introduced us to film noir, German Expressionism, Swedish films by Ingmar Bergman, French Cinema, including films by Francois Truffaut, my favorite, Jules & Jim, and the avant-garde and political films of the late 1960s and early 1970s by American directors. When Frank and I married in 1970, our honeymoon consisted of a hotel stay in Milwaukee for a week, with movie afternoons and evenings with dinner.

Today, I watch films in the theater whenever I’m able, still my preference for the experience on a big screen, plus content streamed at home, at the University of Wisconsin curated by Madison cinephiles, and the Wisconsin Film Festival.

I often see a movie matinee on my own, sometimes with friends and family, and seldom buy theater concessions. I can see more films during matinees and by avoiding concessions. I write mini-reviews on Facebook, for this blog, annual Best Films of the Year and each year when I attended, reviews and top picks from the Wisconsin Film Festival. In 2018, I received a press pass and drafted a series of Dispatches from the Wisconsin Film Festival.  

Yesterday, I saw the film, Tony, summarized as follows, “Tony is a 2026 American biographical film about Anthony Bourdain’s early years working in Provincetown, Massachusetts, stories from which were featured in his 2000 memoir Kitchen Confidential.” I enjoyed the film with a couple of minor critiques and will post a mini-review on Facebook.

I’ve also watched Anthony Bourdain’s documentary biopic and a number of Julia Child documentaries, and narrative films. I enjoy documentary and narrative films about the craft and stories about chefs.

Holidays: Food, Family & Friends

Food is always the heart of the holidays when shared with family, friends, and loved ones. Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday since it celebrates the harvest and is shared with the people we love. For me, as someone raised Catholic, Easter was a close second.

Easter featured a ham dinner and sides, baskets of chocolate and candy, included the decorating and hiding of eggs, and in my family as children, finding the prized Poop Egg, which gave the finder bragging rights for the year. My niece, Casey and her family have carried on the tradition. One more childhood Easter tradition was the Lamb Cake our paternal grandmother featured as the centerpiece of the extended family Easter Dinner after church.  One more connection between food and movies, is our eldest cousin would chaperone all the young kids to a Disney movie matinee downtown in our hometown of Racine.

At the age of 21, I made my first Thanksgiving Dinner. On the eve of Thanksgiving, I received a distressing phone call from my mother, my sister Roz, was hit by a car crossing the street and was hospitalized in the ICU in a coma. Mom asked that I come home immediately to watch my younger siblings and the next morning prepare the Thanksgiving dinner to provide some normalcy for my siblings since our parents would be at the hospital. Gratefully, I had been my mother’s sous chef, so I faced the challenge with some degree of confidence.

As often happens in life, things change. There were years I celebrated Thanksgiving with my bio family, assisting Mom in the kitchen. Those are some of my favorite family memories. There were also years when our family was estranged from each other, and I pivoted, celebrating Thanksgiving and other holidays with my recovering lesbian friends and their families, my new chosen family. We called ourselves, The Orphans and celebrated, The Orphan Holidays. Read more by clicking on the link at the end of this essay.

After our family reconciled, I created new holiday traditions again with my long-term lesbian partner, Cindy. She was a social introvert. We found a rotating ritual that worked for our us while still nurturing holiday traditions and relationships with both our bio and chosen families. One year we’d have Thanksgiving with my family, the next with The Orphans, and one year just the two of us. It was a compromise that satisfied everyone. Food is often the connecting experience. It both feeds our bellies, and nurtures our relationships.

After Cindy and I separated, I began living alone. I’d join my family for the holiday and as our mother aged and after she died, with help from my siblings I’d make the Thanksgiving Dinner. I would sometimes return home the Friday after Thanksgiving and make Black Friday Turkey & Sides so I’d have leftovers. We continued to celebrate the holiday together at our childhood home until after a couple of years our father’s grief after our mother’s death, only accentuated her absence. Mom was the heart of all our holidays.

In 2020 during the start of the COVID-19, things changed, again. For a couple of years, I celebrated all the holidays: Christmas, New Year’s, my birthday, Easter, and Thanksgiving home alone. I was grateful I was a good home cook.  One positive outcome from the pandemic is a trio of my closest friends and I, who shared the same commitment to remaining healthy, created The Pod Squad, safely dining outdoors, and having brunch in the garage with the door open in the fall. This began a tradition of brunching.

Home Cooking, Brunches, Madison Restaurant Week, Seven Acre Dairy Company, Food Trucks, Food Network, Sur la Table, & Social Media

As I lived alone and aged, food became the last sensual pleasure I enjoyed regularly. Watching films and content a close second. Food also posed a challenge since I was both an emotional and compulsive overeater. I ate when I was lonely, anxious, to regulate difficult emotions, and to numb out from unaddressed childhood trauma, shame, and stigma.

As a person in recovery, I knew how to fully abstain and totally give up alcohol and nicotine, yet food posed more of a challenge. I needed to learn how to lean into my feelings, address past trauma, eat healthy, and exercise more. Gratefully, therapy and a GLP-1 medication helped.

Home Cooking

I still prepare and enjoy some of my childhood comfort foods. When our father was still alive, I froze leftovers so he could enjoy some of the foods Mom made. He always pointed out if I used an ingredient or spice different than Mom’s. Mom’s cooking was not seasoned aggressively (I didn’t want to say bland). When Dad was at the end-of-his life under hospice care, his daughters delivered some of his favorite foods when he had a difficult time with solids, I brough tomato soup and a strawberry milkshake during my last visit.

Eating less, or not eating, is one of the final things people do as they die, and yet our desire is to feed them. Dad near the end of his life, surrounded by his daughters, after he paused from a meal, we encouraged him to eat more. He responded, “I’ll eat more if you girls want me too!” At this point he was eating for us.

When Frank was under the care of hospice and in the nursing home, I delivered leftovers he enjoyed: sausage, beef stew, and since he loved seafood, I delivered a Cousin’s Maine Lobster Food Truck, Maine Lobster Roll. His appetite was fairly suppressed at the time because of his medications, yet he ate every last bite. Like our father, Frank stopped eating at the end of his life.

When I lived with other people, including family, roommates, and when married or partnered, I believe I leave the relationship with at least one recipe I’ll continue to make. A short list: Tuna & Egg Salad with Grilled Cheese Sammie, Southern-style Macaroni & Tomatoes, and a Hungarian-inspired Beef Stew with Sweet Paprika.  From my sister, Cindy, I learned how to make Scotch Eggs. My favorites are our maternal family’s Homemade Chicken & Egg Dumpling Noodles, and Mom’s American-style Chop Suey.

 

My palate has expanded as I’ve shared meals with friends and experimented with new recipes.  In an attempt to increase my recipe book and explore different ethnic foods, Asian and Italian recipes have joined my repertoire. I’ve added a couple of new kitchen appliances too, a six-in-one Wonder Oven, to toast, roast, bake, broil, air fry, and reheat, plus a small blender/smoothie maker. I’ve also added two stovetop ceramic cookware, a steamer, and as a hat-tip to my first job as a grill cook, a carbon steel flattop grill.

Brunches

Since I’ve lived alone one of my favorite things to do with friends and family is brunching. Yes, I’ve become a boomer cliché. Brunches with the Pod Squad helped me survive the pandemic, providing the social connection I needed. Members of the squad are also foodies and great cooks. We get together about once a month for a three-to-four-hour brunch. There’s always too much food and a lot of catching up to do. It’s the perfect example, like holiday traditions, that feed our belly and nurture our hearts.

With other friends I get together regularly for brunch or coffee dates at my Third Place, Northstreet, which features sweet and savory bakery. Sometimes we explore other options, like Ancora Café, Lakeside Street Coffeehouse, Original Pancake House, The Jet Room, and during the winter, brunch at the Garver Feed Mill Winter Farmer’s Market.

Madison Restaurant Week

One of my favorite annual traditions is the Madison Winter Restaurant Week. Chosen family and Pod Squad member, Leanne and I share January birthdays. For the past 18 years we have celebrated our joint birthdays at a different restaurant with a prix fixed menu of an appetizer, entrée, and dessert. With the Pod Squad, sometimes individually or together, we’ve attended the Madison Summer Restaurant Week.

Seven Acre Dairy Company

A favorite foodie destination outside of Madison in Paoli, Wisconsin is the Seven Acre Dairy Company. From its website, “Nestled on the banks of the Sugar River in Paoli, Wisconsin and listed on the National Register of Historic Places, Seven Acre Dairy Company is a lovingly restored dairy factory reimagined as a one-of-a-kind place to dine, stay, and celebrate.”

Following the theme of brunching, I’ve enjoyed weekend brunches, Jazz Brunches, and Easter Brunch with friends and chosen family. I’ve attended both an indoor Guest Chef Texas BBQ Event for my birthday this year, and recently this month, an outdoor Midsummer Pig Roast with Pitmaster Michelle Wallace, Primal Cue, and Dan Fox.  

Yes, I admit to be a bit of a fan girl since Michelle Wallace is one of my favorite competition and celebrity chefs who was featured on Top Chef, both as a competitor and judge, and also appeared competing on Beat Bobby Flay, and Bobby Flay’s Triple Threat. Her next event at Seven Acre Dairy Company in September is Michelle Wallace Presents the Sugar River Fire & Smoke Festival, A Celebration of BBQ on the banks of the Sugar River. Michelle referred to me as ‘Miss Linda” and I melted.

Next, the historic dairy has begun construction on The Lodge, six rooms with porches, a firepit, and dedicated parking overlooking the Sugar River, that augments their boutique hotel rooms, restaurant, sauna, ice cream parlor, and gift shoppe. It’s a foodie destination with options for overnight stays. I suggest you sign up for their newsletter. The dairy has special events, family fun, outdoor fish frys, romantic and date night dinners, and the list goes on.

Food Trucks

In the past I’ve enjoyed food trucks downtown on Capitol Square, on Library Mall on the University of Wisconsin Campus, Food Truck Fridays at the Garver Feed Mill, and Madison Summer Food Truck Neighborhood Events.

My current favorite food truck is Cousin’s Maine Lobster Food Truck which was launched with an investment from Shark Tank. It’s a franchise and we’re lucky to have a Madison/Milwaukee franchisee. I’m also currently watching the Food Network’s Great Food Truck Race.

Food Network & Bravo Cooking Shows

The Pod Squad and I watch a lot of Food Network shows. There are too many for me to list, some I watch religiously, others I watch when bored, when searching for inspiration, new recipes, or adding new food prep techniques. An almost short-list of favorite shows:

• Top Chef
• America’s Culinary Cup
• Beat Bobby Flay
• Bobby’s Triple Threat
• Alex vs. America
• Wildcard Kitchen
• BBQ Brawl
• Pitmaster

Sur la Table

One of the outcomes of watching cooking shows is I want to get in the kitchen and cook, try new recipes, and expand my repertoire. Once again, foodie friend, chosen family, and Pod Squad member, Leanne saves the day. We’ve taken cooking classes at Sur la Table and one of the additional benefits of learning to prepare new foods is the 20% discount on purchases that day.

We’ve taken three cooking classes at Sur la Table in the last couple of years, all Asian-inspired, Koreantown Kitchen, Dim Sum Fun, and Vietnamese Classics. One of the benefits for the rest of The Pod Squad, including me, is Leanne has invited us to dinner to enjoy what we learned. I recently shopped at the Asian Grocery Store at the Global Food Market to stock up on the ingredients I would need for dumplings, shumai, potstickers, and noodle bowls.

One of my favorite meals for lunch or dinner are ramen, rice, or egg noodle bowls. I’ve created my own recipes with the proteins and vegetables I prefer including peppers, shallots, Bok Coy, and scallions. Now I’ve added the Dim Sum.

Social Media

I’ve become that person who posts the meals for one I make for myself. I have conflicting feelings about it. I ask, am I showing off? Am I seeking atta-girls? Have I lived alone too long? Am I attempting to attract a mate with my cooking acumen? Oh, my! Again, I’m overthinking.

The reality is, I do receive a warm response of likes and compliments, and sometimes friends or family request the recipe. I’ve become a confident home cook and often only use the recipe as starting point and make alterations based on the ingredients I prefer and have already stocked in my pantry.

I also watch reels and videos on my phone featuring reviews of food by content creators, mukbang, “…an online video trend where a host eats large quantities of food while interacting with an audience,” and other time-wasting, yet addictive content. One could consider it food porn or food voyeurism. Yikes!

Final Thoughts

One last concern regarding the posts of the food I prepare, reviews of Food Network shows or films I watch, and even the publishing and distribution of this blog essay, is the realization that food insecurity is growing.  Children, the aging, unhoused, under and unemployed, plus people who’ve been removed from SNAP or had their benefits reduced are suffering the most. In this nation, with wealth centralized by a privileged few and the profits of corporations and their stockholders, including food producers growing (not independent and family farms who are struggling), it’s shocking we have people in the United States and the world going hungry. It’s criminal.

I retired from my half-time job on the eve of turning 76-years-old in December, 2025. I have a small savings and earn close to the average monthly Social Security check. In 2032, it most likely will be reduced by an estimated 22% since Congress has not taken action. I’ve worked 60 years and contributed to Social Security. I estimate with my savings and current Social Security I have enough income as a single person who lives alone to get by on a strict budget (no travel, limited discretionary purchases, etc.) for maybe five or six years before I join the impoverished.

Currently, my income is already less than what is required for a single person living alone. I’m grateful I have food in my pantry, that I don’t live in a food desert, and I don’t go to bed hungry. Today, I can feed myself and enjoy healthy food to be nourished and for pleasure. The question I ask on behalf of others, and soon for myself, for how long?

Note: My current housing, food, and healthcare costs exceed that budget for monthly expenses.

Lastly, after writing about food, I’m hungry for comfort and comfort food. Tomorrow I’ll make Sloppy Joes with Ruffles Potato Chips and milk on ice. Yeah, I’m that girl.

Related Reading from Mixed Metaphors, Oh My!

Childhood Comfort Food: Served with Memories

Comfort Food: Winter Blues, Holidays & Weight Gain

The Comfort of Sourdough Pancakes

Thanksgiving: Things Change (Again!)

Poop Eggs & Lamb Cakes

The Orphan Holidays

For the Love of Movies (& Memories of My Mother)

Good Morning

Oleo Run

What’s Up with Ketchup & Mustard?

The Skinny on Medicalized Obesity

Fed Up & Hungry for Change

Additional Content on the Topic

Movie Theater Munchies

The Food That Built America

Sur la Table

Seven Acre Dairy Company