Tag Archives: Shame

The Last Closet Door: Act III

Secret Life: Clean Out the Closet

“All human beings have three lives, a public life, a private life, and a secret life.”  Hamill added, “A private life is by invitation only. A secret life is nobody’s business.”  — Pete Hamill

“You can’t be what you can’t see.” — Martha Popp

Today, October 26, 2025 is Intersex Awareness Day.

Background on the Series

For readers who missed the first installment of this series — I opened the last closet door to the public on October 26, 2023, Intersex Awareness Day, when I revealed — I’m intersex. I was born with Androgen Insensitivity Syndrome (AIS). Today, again, I invite you to learn about my private and secret life.

A simple definition: Intersex is an umbrella term that describes bodies that fall outside the strict male/female binary. There are two types of Androgen Insensitivity Syndrome, complete and partial. My condition is the former (CAIS) and can be described as follows: Infants with complete androgen insensitivity syndrome appear to be female at birth, but do not have a uterus, fallopian tubes, or ovaries. Their testicles (gonads) are hidden inside the pelvis or abdomen. Breasts develop during puberty, but there is little or no pubic and armpit hair. Continue reading

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The Last Closet Door: Act II

Private Life: Look Inside

“All human beings have three lives, a public life, a private life, and a secret life.”  Hamill added, “A private life is by invitation only. A secret life is nobody’s business.”  — Pete Hamill

“You can’t be what you can’t see.” — Martha Popp

Background on the Series

For readers who missed the first installment of this series I opened the last closet door to the public on October 26, 2023, Intersex Awareness Day, when I revealed — I’m intersex. I was born with Androgen Insensitivity Syndrome (AIS). Today, I invite you to learn about my private life. Continue reading

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Me Too — DAMMIT!

Trigger Warning: This essay contains firsthand memories of sexual molestation and harassment.

From my memoir, Perfectly Flawed:

“It was during one of those occasions I lay napping on the guest bed at my maternal grandmother’s house, on the chenille bedspread under the picture of the geese taking flight from the marsh, Charlie came into the bedroom to wake me.  As I struggled to gain consciousness and understand what was happening, I could feel Charlie’s beard stubble scrape my cheeks like sandpaper. His beer and cigar-soaked breath was at my ear, breathing heavily. Continue reading

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