Tag Archives: Chosen Family

The Last Chapter: Retirement Reset

Retirement Journey: Part II

“You cannot give your life more time, so give your time more life.”  — Unattributed

“Instead of a human doing, I want to be a human being.” — Retirement Aspiration

A Look Back at the Year

As a person in recovery, at the end of the day, I often take a daily inventory, a review of the day to assess my successes and missteps. I ask if there are amends to be made, and how I can do better moving forward. On this eve of the New Year and my 76th birthday in January, I continue to be a work in progress.

At the end of each year, like many others on the eve of the New Year, I look back at the highlights and lowlights — the gains and the losses — the hellos and goodbyes.

For this blog, I often write a year-in- review. Full disclosure: I’m sometimes a bit snarky in response to the holiday letters people send this time of year, yet I must admit, this is my version. I understand why it’s important to review one’s year, to celebrate wins and acknowledge losses, and if one chooses, to share with loved ones and friends. A lot happens in a day, a year, and a life. Continue reading

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

From Human Doing to Human Being

Retirement Journey: Part I

“It is utterly false and cruelly arbitrary to put all the play and learning into childhood, all the work into middle age, and all the regrets into old age.”  — Margaret Mead

“The path ahead: Take it one day at a time, to live in the moment, to be a human being, not a human doing, and when I’m able, a human becoming.” — Retirement Aspiration

How I Got Here

Two weeks ago, I made the difficult and life-changing decision to retire at the end of the year. I had been thinking about it for the past year, as I watched the dust collect in my home, and my closets and kitchen cabinets overflow. Next, piles of books, old technology, last year’s holiday decorations, and the last box of photos and newspaper clippings from our childhood after our father died began to find homes under the bed and stacked along the walls. I need to purge and let go of material things to make room for living.

Continue reading

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Hannah, Abby, & Sam: Virtual BFFs

BFF definition: Informal. plural bffs, BFFs

  1. a person’s best friend, typically a girl’s (sometimes used facetiously)
  2. one’s close associate, ally, or supporter

“All the literati keep an imaginary friend.”  — W. H. Auden

“I still think most writers are just kids who refuse to grow up. We’re still playing imaginary games, with our imaginary friends.”  — Ian Rankin

Continue reading

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Things Change: Look Back at 2024 & Look Ahead to 2025

“What matters in life is not what happens to you but what you remember and how you remember it.” ― Gabriel García Márquez

On the Sunday before New Year’s Day, I relaxed in my recliner, watched CBS Sunday Morning — my weekly ritual — with the fireplace glowing, cozy, under my holiday gift of a soft throw. Definitely, a hygge moment. Hygee is defined as follows, “…a quality of coziness and comfortable conviviality that engenders a feeling of contentment or well-being (regarded as a defining characteristic of Danish culture).”

Continue reading

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

The Last Goodbye

We bid farewell to our father, grandfather, and great grandfather.

“Someday I’m going to write a book about our family!” — This writer as a defiant 16-year-old.

“I look forward to reading it!” — Our beloved mother

First, I haven’t drafted and posted new content for this blog since the end of October. The past three months have been a challenge and an unexpected journey. Though I’ve not written for my blog, I’ve done more writing during this period compared to what is typical. Most of it communication with bio and chosen family, journal entries, and social media posts. Continue reading

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Meditations on Mortality: Grief & Gratitude

Meditation definition (Oxford Languages) – a written or spoken discourse expressing considered thoughts on a subject.

Mortality definition (Oxford Languages) – the state of being subject to death. 

“You don’t get to choose how you’re going to die, or when. You can only decide how you’re going to live.” — Joan Baez

As a person of a certain age — living my seventh decade — death and dying are on my mind.

Recently, there have been unexpected deaths of friends and loved ones, plus celebrities and artists in the public sphere, caused by accidents, deadly health crisis, unknown reasons, suicide, or overdose. When we’re unprepared for the sudden news, it’s both shocking and unsettling. For many of us, it’s a reminder of our own mortality. Continue reading

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Fractured, Not Broken!

Fractured Definition: having a crack or breakhaving suffered a fracture

Broken Definition: (of a person) having given up all hope; despairing 

Resilient Definition: (of a person) able to withstand or recover quickly from difficult conditions

On Wednesday, May 17th, I accidentally fell forward while attending the Opioid, Stimulants, and Trauma Summit sponsored by the State of Wisconsin Department of Health Services at the Kalahari Resort and Conference Center in Wisconsin Dells and fractured the humerus of my right, dominant arm. Ouch! Continue reading

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Poop Eggs, Orphan Holidays, Home Alone, & Gratitude

“For me, this holiday is a time for reflection, for renewing a spiritual connection, and for experiencing the hope and promise of the new beginnings of the spring season.” — An excerpt from my journal, Perfectly Flawed.

Leading up to Easter this year, I spent a lot of time reminiscing, rereading journal entries from holidays past and Easter-themed blog musings. Holidays, and the family rituals which we grew up with and the memories that remain, are mile markers of our journey in life. They provide a backdrop of the values and traditions of our ancestry and worship, the foundation of our beliefs. From childhood to adulthood, to this third chapter in my life, holiday traditions and rituals have evolved, some things nostalgically remain the same, others changed as I changed, and as the world changed. Continue reading

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

It Takes a Village: Lessons Learned

“We are all in this together.” ― Hillary Rodham Clinton, It Takes a Village

 “Accepting help is its own kind of strength.” ―  Kiera Cass

February will be the 10th Anniversary of my blog, Mixed Metaphors, Oh My! When I began designing it, I first needed to determine why I write. I saw it first as an extension of my journals, except I would invite others to read what I wrote. From the About section of the blog, Why I Write:

First, I consider myself a journalist, not the fact-checking, who, what, where, and when kind of reporter – but the gut-checking – why did this, or why is this happening to me or others and what can I learn from the experience – activist-essayist and memoirist. I keep journals, write memoirs and personal narratives as a record of my journey and exploration inward, allowing me to excavate and externalize aspects of my essence and experience, bringing them out of the shadows and into the light. Journaling and writing personal narratives is the process of first becoming aware, accepting and embracing what I have uncovered, followed by the charting of a new course. Continue reading

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Dispatch from the Hideout: Hip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah!

“Zip-a-dee-doo-dah, zip-a-dee-ay
My, oh, my, what a wonderful day
Plenty of sunshine headin’ my way
Zip-a-dee-doo-dah, zip-a-dee-ay!”

[Song composed by Allie Wrubel with lyrics by Ray Gilbert for the Disney 1946 live action and animated movie Song of the South, sung by James Baskett.]

First, I took some liberty with the happy song from my childhood for the title of this installment of the Dispatch from the Hideout series, to express optimism about the relief and restoration I hope to experience from my upcoming hip-replacement surgery.

A note about the movie that featured the song: It was considered by the NAACP as racist and released this statement, “…in an effort neither to offend audiences in the North or South, the production helps to perpetuate a dangerously glorified picture of slavery … [the film] unfortunately gives the impression of an idyllic master-slave relationship, which is a distortion of the facts.”  To read more about the film and the controversy it caused, Song of the South: 12 Things to Know About Disney’s Most Controversial Movie.

Continue reading

Tagged , , , , , , , , ,